Wellness Ted Proves How Ridiculous Bloggers Can Be

We’re all familiar with wellness Instagrammers. They’re the ones making healthy meals that look too delicious to actually be good for you, the ones who somehow find time to work out eight days per week, who never drink alcohol, and who genuinely enjoy eating salads every day (?!?!?).

Well, Edward Lane, a Men’s Health UK editor, is familiar with them too. He created a hilarious parody account, Wellness Ted, to poke fun at the world of influencers on Instagram, which, as he puts it, “takes itself way too f*cking seriously.” If his goal is to make people step back and look more critically at some of the stuff healthy bloggers post, he’s definitely succeeded—just ask his 20K followers.

But Wellness Ted isn’t just amazing because it’s hilariously spot-on (the six-pack abs, the novel-length captions detailing the health benefits of each ingredient in a meal), but also because it’s actually making an important point about separating reality from Instagram.

As the boyfriend of an Instagram celeb (he dates Amy Hopkinson), Lane knows what really goes into those perfectly curated blogs. Many of his posts explain what happens behind the scenes, emphasizing that what you see doesn’t always reflect reality.

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PROGRESS // On the left – unhealthy. On the right – healthy. At the start of the year I thought the only way to get abs was being restrictive with my diet. Pizza was on the menu – but only in bite size pieces. And, as you can see from the look on my face, I wasn’t happy about it! And then all of a sudden I discovered the WHOLE FOODS DIET. Before that I never knew what whole foods really meant – and then I realised it just meant ALL OF IT. And I’ve not looked back since. For months I’d been enviously scrolling Instagram seeing lean influencers photographing and talking about all the amazing treats they squeeze into their nutrition plans – doughnuts, popcorn, chocolate, peanut butter, chocolate AND peanut butter – while still looking fantastic. Initially I thought they were all a bunch of phoney liars. Taking a picture of doughy goodness before turning to a plate of leaves. But now I know that, contrary to some people’s concerns, everything you see on social media is genuine and real *breathes sigh of relief* And it turns out there’s some science behind it too. Research conducted by the esteemed Dr Oetker – an expert in the field – found that refusing to slice up your pizza and eating it whole means your body has to work harder to break it down. This slowing of digestion prevents the insulin spikes associated with weight gain and helps you to feel fuller for longer, preventing snacking. Now that’s what I call an upper crust health tip! Lunch, anyone?

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Even though we love that wellness bloggers motivate us to do all those healthy things we’re tempted to avoid, it’s refreshing to have someone like Wellness Ted in our feed to remind us life’s not all about abs and macronutrients. Sometimes it’s about putting on comfy athleisure and having a few beers.

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